josh is stupid and boring and self-centered and stupid and has crabs

letters to a young poet

2007-02-07T20:27:00.001-05:00

this is from a series of letters rainer maria rilke wrote to a young (and somewhat banal) poet whom he treated with nothing but the utmost respect and kindness.

~~~
Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue, a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky.
~~~

the book is about acceptance of human isolation and the possession of one's inner space. it is highly excellent.

it has been suggested that i don't post enough

2007-02-04T23:29:00.001-05:00

that's true, and i'm really too busy to rectify it. but if you must have content, this feed is to become a collection of tidbits from whatever it is i happen to be reading/watching/listening to. i hope it's not too preachy

~~~
Then, one day, after a shot, the Master made a deep bow and broke off the lesson. "Just then 'It' shot!" he cried, as I stared at him bewildered. And when i at last understood what he meant I couldn't surpress a sudden whoop of delight.

"What I have said," the Master told me severely, "was not praise, only a statement that ought not to touch you. Nor was my bow meant for you, for you are entirely innocent of this shot. You remained this time absolutely self-oblivious and without purpose in the highest tension, so that the shot fell from you like a ripe fruit. Now go on practicing as if nothing had happened.
~~~

Eugen Herrigel

while other kids play in the park...

2007-01-06T16:17:00.000-05:00

i waste away to a yellow pallor in the studio. awesome.

today is my first day at SoundTrack. in fact, i'm sitting next to John Kiehl right now; he's pretty much one of the coolest people ever. he's playing around with a piece of software called Mathematica.

(from wikipedia)

"The Mathematica programming language is based on term-rewriting and supports both functional and procedural programming (though functional code is much more efficient in general). It is implemented in an object-oriented variant of C, but the bulk of the extensive code library is actually written in the Mathematica language that can be used to extend the system. Typically, new code is added in the form of Mathematica "packages", i.e., text files written in the Mathematica language."

the funny thing about it is that John isn't any more of a computer programmer than he is a record producer. it's all really just a mind-puzzle to him. obviously there'll be a ton of stuff to learn around here this semester.

but anyway, yeah. back in new york, so that's nice. i'm pretty much done with Serious Bob premixing. i need to get the tracks for tom's record together, but i've got a couple of weeks on that so right now i'm just sessioning with John and Mario.

it's high 60s in manhattan today. in january. in sane. this time next year it'll be 80 in the shade, but for now i kinda love global warming.

went out with R and a bunch of her friends last night. we saw a pretty decent indie-pop band in the e.vil. a completely wasted T.H. met me up and we got to catch up afterwords at swift over piles of hotdogs and beer. good times.

SDRNR

2007-01-02T23:23:00.000-05:00

sex, drugs, and rock & roll. what else?

I have things to blog about!! i guess my life must be valid... Jk, I'm finally almost better from last week though. Sweet.

T busted up to mass this weekend to do vocals at Steve's. We worked all afternoon saturday and it went really well despite my sedentary illness. And today I got in to catch up on all the Serious Bob i haven't been doing; i'm through with about 2/3 of premixing, but the rest is fun/creative and not especially editory. So that should be under control in time for me to get back to cityville-ization on thurs. ;o;o;o;o;o that's a face i make when something is secretly awesome like country music or the jersey shore, although the awesome here is hardly a secret.

2007!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!! oh man. i like how this one started; it was cathartic with all the sex (for someone, right?), violence, and celebration. also, jason and i are bringing back the semicolon. generic new years resolutions: i'll be cutting down on the partying to focus on work and exercising more; i 'm all doughy from the holidays and being sick for a week. but 2007 will be different!!! new and exciting!!!! fresh and juicy!!!! rockachuckledocious!!!! an odd number!!!!

webscopes is dead right now, but it's a nice time to be a libra (and hey, when isn't?). i'm to maintain my humility, but focus on abolishing the passive aspects of my demeanor. absolutely. maybe death metal would help... w/evs, good project for ø7.

wishing you all the best in the new year,
y

kind of like... a minor flat 5.

2006-12-11T01:48:00.000-05:00

ramping up to do this regularly once again

unfortunately i have nothing to talk about except being in the studio. "you know what i like about this patchbay?..." that sort of dull-ass shit. nobody shares my enthusiasm for an external key in the new protools 7.3 compression plug-in. but the Serious record is coming along well. i think. we're dropping some tracks, so that will help. unfortunately for you, the listening public, that means no dance music for five to six months. i'm pumped about it though.

r did invite me to a superlative xmas party last night; there was cheap champagne and candykanes. and a tree. and a coat pile. sweet.

hmm, what else...?>? no internship yet. loho offered me something effective immediately and i'd take it, but i want to give soundtrack and the lodge a chance to at least read the res. it's gonna stress me until it's resolved. kind of like... oh whatever.

anyway, that's about it really. the film ends mainly visualy.

i am make post!! it is being retardent!!1!@

2006-11-25T18:28:00.000-05:00

obviously there's nothing to report since my last post. which i wrote to avoid smoking a cigarette. and it sucked. because i literally haven't written anything (blogs, show reviews, my own name) for about 4+ months. and damn. i am out of practice.

so anyway, this is part two in a 12 part mini-series entitled "why no one reads this blog."

like i said in my last post, life hasn't been treating me too badly. my record really started coming together over thanksgiving break, so that's good. i spent a couple of days in Steve's studio and roughly 80% of the editing is now finished. also, i programmed some weirdness on "Robot Song" (and when you know/ a giant robot/ is behind you/you'll think twice/ before you laugh at me/or his heat-ray will be on you). it's my key playing, so you know it's totally amateur, but i think it has some charm. we'll see if Dave and Nate agree.

it's a good thing i finally know where the record is at, cause the personal life has been a little bit cracked out. i caught myself listening to emo last sunday! somebody please smack me right again. i think some of it has to do with not having settled the whole "now what" scenario. yes, i do have a whole semester to sort it out. no, that does not prevent me from obsessing about it. that obsession leads to panic leads to inaction, and i think that inaction is spilling over into other spheres of my life. gyargh.

but whatevs, i'm gonna keep doing what i been doing; drink until i don't care anymore, then send remorseful text messages the next morning.

so until the next time i find myself bored enough to do this... i remain,
skinny and relentlessly self-improving.

apetite for destruction surpressent

2006-11-24T00:53:00.000-05:00

helloooooo cyberspace!

i use more exclamation points than the last time you saw me!!!!

things are good. this semester's records are go, fun party last weekend, a fluffy kitten to daydream about, all that.

anyway, in honor of hearing "November Rain" while i drove home from the studio in the rain, my top five ways to get noticed if you're guns n roses struggling to get signed:

5.) storm a Leukemia telethon offering Slash's hair to one of the patients... slash breaks into a rocking solo from the top of his VW Beetle

4.) enter Duff McKagen and Izzy Stradlin in a USC wet t-shirt contest. slash penetrates the competition with rocking solo after rocking solo until they can't even move

3.) go start a hotel & casino in the middle of the jungle. slash stocks the buffet with small game he killed. death by rocking solo...

2.) step 1: drink. step 2: rocking guitar solos. step 3: profit

1.) write "november rain" for the wicked step-daughter of the evil label president. then slash saves music by cutting the cable suspending a crystal chandelier above them with a rocking solo, dropping the chandelier and slicing them into thin white strips of paper which flutter gently out a window on the cool Malibu breeze.

(throw pencil @ camera)

xxxx FIN xxxx

yes, i am still alive... no, i am not enjoying it

2006-07-07T13:52:00.000-05:00

the problem with blogs is that they require constant attention, and i'm not always in the mood to write. i'm not even in that mood right now but i'm forcing myself.

for your edification absolutely nothing of any import has happened since i last posted in april except:
1. finished the semester in london... travelled to Stockholm, Berlin, Paris, Calais, then back to MA
2. moved back to New York... i miss london.
3. started internship at Astralwerks... lots of new music i haven't bothered to listen to and a signed Erlend Oye poster (score!)
4. trying to find a part time job that pays decent, fits my schedule, and i can tolerate doing long-term... failing miserably
5. nothing. there is no fifth thing.

so anyway, the blog has languished. i promise this was just another one of those mostly-temporary three month hiatus kind of things.

i actually have another writing thing i'm kind of excited about: Amanda and i are starting a music blog. there's a lot of music-oriented stuff here, but i've never bothered to figure out things like quality hosting and how to post mp3s. she's good with the technical stuff and her musical taste is quality to boot so i think it would be pretty kick-ass. maybe we can get it kicking and people will start to send us free promos so i can enjoy the perks of a label job without actually having to get out of bed in the morning.

in other news i started my capstone record this week. me, dave, ty, and nate got four tracks worth of guitar basics done at this nice little studio matty d works at in dumbo. free studio time... bonus! i'm actually starting to get psyched about the record and if i can pull off half the shit i have planned it should be kinda bitchin.

k, i think that's enough for now. i should be pretending to look like i'm kinda working at something vaguely work-related. i'm gonna be better on this from here on out (more empty promises...), so happyhappyjoyjoy to you and yours.

OkGo @ Scala

2006-04-05T20:37:00.000-05:00

In a city of C-grade Coldplay/Smiths knockoffs you tend forget what !!RAwK!! sounds like… and the opening band tonight isn’t going to remind you. They’re young and their songs show promise, but they’re certainly no one who’s name you remember a week later. OkGo is a different story all together. It’s not just that the band is a mean ten years older, or that they have the kind of nom de rock and live poise that come with four years playing the struggling-on-a-major game. The kind of ballsy Chi-town rock these four stomp through during their hour plus set on a Thursday night at Scala is just more fun.

This high fun-factor is the combined result of music that screams “Oh girl!/Let’s crash the party!”, and the deeper appeal that comes with a quirky sense of band-hood (D. Kulash and co. have also written for a Japanese rock monthly, played house band for public radio’s This American Life, and published a guide on overthrowing American presidents). Sure they leap and strut the stage like the rockstars they have the unpretentious freedom to be (thanks to only middling success), but they also have a snappy dance number. Always a crowd pleaser even if it’s a mess; this one isn’t. With moves like that, the kids have no choice but to love it.

And love it they do. You would think the lads and lasses gathered in Scala tonight had never heard a Gibson SG slammed through a distortion pedal before… Come to think of it, maybe they haven’t. So OkGo give them a taste of what they’ve been missing, banging out jams like “Get Over It”, “A Million Ways”, and “Crash The Party” to great effect while the venue’s superlative lights and sound kick and spin like the diehards in the mosh pit. Clearly enjoying the warm reception they’ve received in chilly old England (after a highly uncool run-in with the police in Orlando, Florida), the band is relaxed and engaging between songs and enthusiastic about the current tour, their new record, and a general exuberance at being out of the van.

So will the shows and a new major label release win them the kind of success in London that fuels press orgies? It seems possible tonight, but the band won’t be staying to find out. They have momentum, and after a grasp at success with “Get Over It,” the single from their last record, there’s no reason to let go. (ok?)

my brain went to amsterdam and all i got was this case of tha clap...

2006-03-06T19:16:00.000-05:00

hahaha. oh man, not really though. prostitutes are gross and depressing, and sometimes hot... but mostly gross and cracked out.

anyway, the trip was great. i went with rob and sam and greg and di and devon and we roct out. we stayed at the Flying Pig Uptown together, which i would totally recommend. it's kind of a walk sometimes (although nothing by London standards), but the facilities are great, and i liked staying a little outside the city. besides, it's right near the rijksmuseum and the "heineken brewing experience," both of which you will want to see.

we actually did quite a lot considering we (or i guess just sam and i) were stoned like afghani women the whole time. we walked at least two-thirds of the city, took a boat tour, put in some quality time with Van Gogh's Field With Crows and Almond Tree In Bloom, saw some comedy, visited the Grasshopper and the redlight district, ate like 16 meals, and went to the sex museum (where i felt nothing but awkward... i guess my interest in sex is purely personal. i mean, i fancy myself a dog lover, but there are definite limits.). there are pictures; i'll try and post them on facebook.

ok, i want to write more but it's late and i'm already gonna be destroyed for writing london. email soon... cheers!

Fundon!

2006-02-03T06:33:00.000-05:00

before i even start, i have this punchline (or maybe it's the setup)...
"So I heard you're a lebanese... Er, sorry, I mean dyke."
and no joke to go with it. thoughts?

Anyway, on to the real business of giving you the business...

To answer your first two questions; yes, I am in London, and no, there's just not enough recycling centers in the world to handle all the eurotrash here.

Everyone's been hitting the nightlife so hard that I kinda wish I had an excuse to stay in. The scene here is a bit different though. Firstly, the parties that should, by New York preconceptions, be awesome, are actually bland,
homogenized attempts to ape the whole LES/E Village thing. If I hear just one more emaciated, Diesel and "vintage" wearing douche talk about how hard it is to find pot here I'm gonna scream. But on the flip side, the random, uncool in a Jack Johnson sort of way, basement get togethers are lively and fun and fuzzy with liquor. I don't get it... Are those people the cool kids here? Must discuss with Arianna.

Ok, so nightlife = good. Social life = better. It's a nice change from "the scene" at school to have everyone thrown into a situation where they have to at least try to make friends with everyone else. Also, there are about three girls for every boy here. Or maybe there are only half a dozen straight guys, so it just seems like that. Sometimes I almost feel bad for them... As Tom put it (actually, I put it to Tom, but it sounds sleazy so I'm attributing it to him), "It's like fucking fish in a barrel." Love the scaley, writhing imagery... Meeting lots of good people, expanding my horizons, all that shit.

In other news this morning was the first time I've woken up naturally before 1430 (they use military time a lot over here... all kinds of weird). It might be the beer working it's way out of my system, or I might actually be adjusting to the time change. Either way, it's kind of nice to have an entire day ahead of me (during which I will still accomplish nothing, but the opportunity's there).

I know I'm forgetting things, but I'm hungover from a week-long drunk and tired from killing the shark that ate my friend.

lalala

2006-01-11T01:00:00.000-05:00

i just got back from los angeles. i loved it. it was really sunny and the sunlight just creeps into everything there. plus LA is just a bunch of suburbs so it feels like home, but they have all the amenities of a big city. it's not all on one island, but the driving didn't bother me nearly as much as i thought it would. maybe i haven't spent enough time doing it, but it's warm so who cares?

anyway, i'm already trying to pick a neighborhood and a car for after graduation...

solongsemester!

2005-12-14T20:47:00.000-05:00

wow, i wonder how long this has been blank for... ¡irregardless! i am home now and actually enjoying myself, as the 'rents are down in FL. monday's party was a good start, but i'm hoping to outdo either tomorrow or friday. nice to see that i'm not quite as friendless in MA as i thought...

still haven't seen any grades yet, dunno what that's about. i guess it's just as likely to be a good thing that i haven't seen them anyway. every time i think about last semester i get this whole "what the hell just happened?" vibe.

i finished, uh, nothing over break. haven't unpacked, haven't gotten ready for LA, haven't redirected my magazine subscriptions. oh wait, i did one load of laundry last tuesday. woot.

anyway, gotta run. i'm actually doing things today. wonderful things, like going to the bank, sorting the mail, and buying large amounts of beer. hooray!

2005-12-11T00:50:00.000-05:00

sometimes i wonder if the internet will be what kills government...

oh sarah silverman, you're last name's like mine...

2005-12-08T11:55:00.000-05:00

anyway, since i've been a busy little jew lately i haven't had time to make war on Christmas, so i thought i'd let the lovely and talented sarah silverman do it for me. check it out...

http://oilfactory.com/video.php?video=249

(UPDATE: wow, i guess it's link day)

CIA sabotage manual circa 1980

http://www.flickr.com/photos/mickie/sets/983397/

sooooo, does anyone know any governments that need overthrowing?

note to the internet...

2005-12-02T21:53:00.000-05:00

just a quick roundup of things that a lot of people out there have missed recently...

1. the OC = over, comprendo?

2. madonna, please go the fuck away. you haven't been genuinely relevent for the last 15 years.

3. yesterday's news: The Daily Show, new hotness: The Colbert Report

i'll prob think of more later, but take the time to digest these for now b/c if i have to say it again i'm gonna be pissed.

Sup'date

2005-11-29T16:03:00.000-05:00

hrm. ladeedadeeda. what's been happening lately?

a little and a lot i guess. a bunch of stuff is starting to wind down... class, work, record, etc. i think the semester went well (even it wasn't reflected in my grades); i'm psyched about how Tom's EP is finishing up. Since I'm going to miss the release party I was thinking we might have an in-studio listening party with a few of our nearest and dearest. Cheap champagne in plastic cups, cigarette smoke thicker than the air in LA, and ballsy rock and roll... that would be just about hot enough to make up a scene in my carefully tailored life.

anyway, thxgiving break was pretty ok. it's always interesting to see the old companeros... see how everyone's doing and all that. a little awk at the same time though; we kind of don't have as much in common as we used to, and with some of them it's hard to tell whether or not they've grown up one day in the last three years. ah well...

i should wrap this up before i wax too nostalgic. and I just think it's smashin'/that peace is back in fashion.

Maureen Down: Frigid Bitch

2005-11-13T00:40:00.000-05:00

i just thought i'd chime in, since the media seems to have it's panties in such a bunch...

We don't like people who don't like us

2005-10-24T22:51:00.003-05:00

Yes, I know. I have been terrible about doing this lately. I only take solace in the thought that the blogosphereis built on the twin pillars of distraction and the avoidance of work, and thus has not collapsed, but been validated by my total lack of posts. Anyway...

There is much to report, but I have forgotten most of it. SATs are still just as tedious as when you and I took them, except now they include the writing of a dull essay, VH1 has been uneventful (although it has turned out to be a really good place to meet girls), and I'm not even sure what's going on in half of my classes. However, that last is going to change because...

I finally finished tracking Tom's EP! HOoRaY!!!!! When I left the studio yesterday, I felt like I had walked out of a moist, dark cave, after 6 weeks of isolation and gnawing hunger. But now is the summer of my bliss-content, and I am definitely feeling better. Tracking on a tight schedule is really stressful because (obviously) I can't actually control the situation as much as I like to, and you can't force a great take out of someone. But Tom and his guys came through (esp. Brandon... holla) and we got what we needed, so I'm taking a few days off before I start prepping for the mix.

Getting all that done has been kind of an eye-opener to how fast the semester's going. It's almost November and I have only the vaguest notion of where I am and what's been happening to me this fall. But that's fine. The sooner the semester ends, the sooner I get to London! I'm not doing arty, recorded music exchange. I'm gonna slack off a little, enjoy the city, and try to learn about something not directly related to my profession. It should be a nice change of pace from the last few months and my last chance to be a slacker college student (which I do so enjoy).

wow, what a boring post. i'll try and do something fun before the end of the week. promise.

Extraordinary Mistake?

2005-10-11T12:48:00.000-05:00

I'm absolutely dumbfounded. Just when the music listening public most needs the snarky establishment of popular music journalism... it's nowhere to be found. Rather, everyone from Rolling Stone (unsurprisingly) to Pitchfork (more surprising) has let Sony, the producers, and even (especially?) Fiona herself off the hook for her new album. Why!? Why why why why why?

Let me make it clear before I go any further: I really really really like the leaked Extraordinary Machine. I'm not gonna say love, cause this is not about love, but it's definitely one of my top five records this year. It's not the best sounding thing out there (to my ears most of the tracks don't seem even remotely mastered), but the songwriting is some of Fiona's best, Jon Brion is in peak form, wrapping the quirky material in a mood that makes the record cohesive. I have probably listened to this record in its entirity more times than any other this year.

So of course Sony incurred my wrath when the buzz was that they had shelved the album for lack of a commercial single. And don't think they can't do that. If a major label doesn't like what they hear, they don't have to release it. Essentially locking an artist's career in stasis until they rerecord to the label's tastes or fight a costly legal battle to escape their contract (and even then, that record can never see the light of day). However, this is the sort of blinkered, Philistine pig-ignorance that we all expect from the major labels. The corporate jerkoffs can't hear the commercial potential of a classicly Fiona track like "Better Version of Me," so they hold the artist hostage until they agree to go back into the studio and get it "commercially viable."

This brings me to the next person(s) on my shit list: John Brion and Mike Elizondo (for those who don't know, Elizondo is Dr. Dre's long time engineer). I am a big fan of both, they both failed this project, albeit for very different reasons. First comes Brion. His work on the leaked version was really excellent, and I have a sneaking suspicion that he was responsible for its release into the wilds of the internet after becoming frustrated with Sony. However, I can't help but think he should have fought harder for the project. Leak whichever track you think is the single, watch it take off, and then go back to Sony and say "look, you fucking Charlatans." As for Elizondo, he just displayed a relative lack of creative sensitivity towards the project. Many of the tracks are less inspired, less interesting versions of their former selves. The new version of "Used to Love Him," retitled "Tymps (The Sick In the Head Song)," is literally a Fiona vocal dropped over a Dre beat. You can actually hear the guitar from "The Next Episode" in the background. I'm not saying it doesn't work, it just feels uninspired.

But Fiona is the real criminal here (can you imagine music journalism without the retarded puns?). In her interview in last week's Rolling Stone, she made it seem like she was the one unhappy with record, not just Sony, then she goes on to praise Elizondo's reworking of it. If true, it's embarassing, and if false, well... I'm sorry, when you do things like go out and hire someone with a reputation as pop hit maker in a genre that has to bearing on your own to rework your record after the label shelves it, you're sacrificing your artistic integrity. If you claim it was your idea, you're sacrificing your artistic integrity. If you change the title of songs to include a line from the chorus in parenthesis, you're sacrificing your artistic integrity.

Anyone who knows me well is aware that Fiona is my dream crush. Gorgeous, quirky, thoughtful, insanely talented... And I don't think much less of her for making the mistakes she made. Put yourself in her shoes: You're in your early 20s and you're employer is holding your career hostage unless you bend to their will. Who wouldn't? I too have spent months at a time sitting on the couch, watching reruns on Bravo (though in my case it was The West Wing, not Columbo), wondering what the fuck I was going to do with my life. I don't blame Fiona, I'm just a little bit disappointed that once again the record industry has triumphed over the forces of art.

UPDATE: I listened to the new version again and I was a bit softer on it this time. It's still a bit intentionally commercial for my tastes and I think it makes less sense artistically, but it's got some post-modern appeal.

Intelligent Design. (revised while sober)

2005-10-01T22:52:00.000-05:00

There's been much ado about this lately and I hadn't really thought about it because I operate under the assumption that the Right is always wrong. However, I was on my way to a party on Saturday and a thought occurred to me:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An old, fat, bald white man is sitting across the table from me. He's ranting on about this invisible force that moves the universe in mysterious, but deliberate ways. I'm kind of listening, but really I'm zoned out, staring at his head wondering if his wife polishes it in the morning or if he does it himself. Anyway, he's going on about how all of creation is blah blah blah...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Except he's talking about quarks. Or mu-mesons. Or some other quantum body.

All encompassing, invisible force, acting deliberately to move every single thing in the universe according to some grand plan. Change plan to law and it's science instead of religion.

At this point the inquisitor in me says "I've never seen it, I've never touched it, convince me." And both sides yammer on through their doctrine, The Gospels, mathematical proofs, electronic devices so complicated no single person understands them completely performing experiments that deliver whatever results they do, meaning whatever any of that means... Why is that different from receiveing sacrament and being forgiven of your sins? An arbitrarily developed apparatus performs a more or less mystical function, the results of which are then interpreted, but never fully explained, to us by members of an elite class.

Oh, but it takes so much learning and practice to become a theoretical physicist. Really? You don't say. I'm told it's not all that easy to become a bishop either.

So what you get is our doctrine of faith versus theirs. I'm not deigning to interpret the foundations of either one, but each is founded on an pledge of faith in some constant force that is expressed in the universe we see.

God? Gravitons? Who cares? I'm not saying intelligent design should be taught in schools, I just think the left should stop being so goddam smug and admit that there are other possibilities for once.

Warren Who-icide?

2005-10-01T14:35:00.000-05:00

SOooo... Rob and I went to Pianos last night to see Warren Suicide, one of the bands his PR firm reps, last night. Definitely some of the best rock I've seen in a while. They were kind of LCD meets Nine Inch Nails, played over live breakbeats. The drummer was a whiteboy with dreads, the keyboardist was dressed like a goth cheerleader from the "Smells Like Teen Spirit" video, and the bassist/lead singer was so sweaty you could smell him from the third row. (Rob says it was cause he was working so hard. I say he was just plain dirty.)

Regardless, they totally rocked the place. It's hard to get a crowd of jaded, coolier than thou LES 20somethings to even come to your show, much less actually make them move. Both were accomplished with verve (the later by the band, and the former by Rob's coworkers at Magnum PR). The energy was excellent and the band seemed tight. I'm not sure if they're actually touring the US at the moment or if they're just here looking for representation (hence the display of energy for the label reps and tastemakers in the audience), but I think they could definitely find a home in the New York scene if they wanted.

Not much to report other than that. Drum tracking starts in an hour, and I have confirmed that the drummer is in the city, ready to go. Now the trick is to not strangle him for last weekend when I see him. Wish me luck...

two weeks later...

2005-09-28T00:04:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I've been bad lately... I know. I'm not sure it's gonna get any better, but I'll try.

Anyway, so much has been going on I can't even think of it all. I'm officially "the most diligent intern [VH1 development] has ever had..." thusly I have conquered and now I'm bored. I really can't bring myself to tell them that the last thing the world needs is more reality TV, but whatever, they let me do whatever I want most of the time.

On a lighter note... I'm officially getting bored with pop culture. Ooo, supermodels do blow. Omg, did you hear Ashton and Demi got married. JK. No one cares about that at all. Even people who spend less time in the blogosphere than me.

Sooo, what else? Tom's junky drummer (get it? like James Brown <-- for my mother) never showed on Sunday. Hey, you know, no big deal... It's not like I hadn't been planning that session out for like a month or anything. We're trying again this Saturday, and I told Tom that if it didn't work out I'm walking out of the project all together. So, you know, I've got that too look forward to.

All in all I'm coming apart at the seams right now, but it'll be fine. I'm cutting back my hours at VH1 a little and I'll probably stop going to Socialism on Mondays since I can do a week's work from just the Wednesday class. Hoping that will help and repeating this week's mantra: "I am not the unmitigated disaster I think I am"

Say it with me now...

Of CMJ

2005-09-16T02:05:00.000-05:00

Ok, I know I've been bad about posting lately, but all of a sudden I have a 50-60 hr work week... It's cool, I'm catching up tonight.

I think my favorite thing about being really busy is the momentum. You get up (hung over) on five hours sleep, go to work, straight from work to class, home for dinner and the OC, then out to five rock concerts, home at 3am, and you're still like "well, I wonder if there are any good parties going right now?" Not smoking pot probably helps too.

Anyway, guess who had the best work day ever?!?!? Paris Hilton! Um, jk, obviously. Girl's never worked a day in her life. Seriously though, when I finished going through all the scripts and treatments mid-afternoon in development and my boss sent me downstairs to work on Best Week Ever. Totally one of my favorite shows, and I was sitting in the room with like 3 other people while they were shooting it. I even got to help prep the talent with a little pre-taping banter/gossip/making fun of Martha Stewart. Awesome. Also, I met the Village People (in addition to the stars of the show, who aren't really what I'd call famous). Awesome squared. Add those dapper gentleman to my list of random celeb encounters.

Then, at the end of the day, Chris Cofoni calls me from Blue Note and tells me that he can hook me up with daily CMJ badges for the rest of the festival. Um, awesome to the eleventeenth. I caught two random bands at Lit and CB's Gallery tonight before I headed downtown for Dungen (very psychedelic, very cool) and Diamond Nights (I liked, but the crowd didn't seem into it) at Bowery, and then Of Montreal at the Knitting Factory (which rocked. that was the first mosh pit I've been in since 6th grade, even if it was a rather polite, apologetic one.). I liked the new material, especially "Reject the Frequecy." The place was packed, the crowd was into it, and they grooved for until after 230. At which point I was ready to sleep in a doorway just to avoid having to walk home. I didn't (obvs), so now I'm home writing this...

What else is new? Um.... The work mostly. I'm taking six classes this semester, interning 20+ hrs/week, and doing my Kaplan thing. This all adds up to very little time for other pursuits, namely sex and drugs. I guess it's cool though. Not to toot my own horn, but I've been really bubly of late and apparently the girls love that sort of thing. I've been picked up twice this week. Rock Rock On!

ps- shoutout to Matt and Katie. those random encounters are def the mos fun. beat that for a rapper spoonerism pun. (whut)

George Bush doesn't care about Usher

2005-09-11T10:28:00.000-05:00

Dear Usher,
Go fuck yourself.

Sincerely,
Everyone

I am

2005-09-08T13:48:00.000-05:00

Ok so I guess, what with Katrina and all, that it has become a little bit more obvious what is wrong with America. I was walking up Broadway on my way to VH1, passing all these tourists thinking "why would anyone want to visit Times Square? It's so tacky."

And it's that unfathomable arrogance which afflicts our nation. I question the value of an edifice like Times Square, without taking a single moment to marvel at its mere existence. I've lived with the pulsing, LCD reality of Times Square for so long that I have had time to develop an opinion of it. Would that would cross the mind of a child from Senegal? or even Eastern Europe?

But here I am, rushing north along Broadway with all the JP Morganites and fly-over tourists, ignoring the fortune of my birthright.

That bitch Katrina

2005-09-01T16:46:00.000-05:00

So much is being said about the relatively biblical destruction of a large part of the gulf coast that I feel I must chime in.

First the immediate... Apparently the city of New Orleans is a total mess; to the extent that members of congress are suggesting that rebuilding would be a waste of resources (since there is no way to prevent a similar catastrophe next hurricane season, and every one after that). What a tragedy. From what I hear, the people that have been hardest hit by the destruction and displacement are those who could least afford it, and considering the high value of the dollar in our current political climate I worry that they're going to be stomped again when it's all over and the government decides on a permanent solution.

I read a piece on Fark today that made reference to this sort of event as a "third world" disaster. Fuck you, whoever wrote that. News flash: mother nature doesn't give two shakes about GDP. It actually seems poetic to me that one of the countries most responsible for damaging the biosphere should be the first to suffer a major climatological disaster. Somehow I doubt that anyone in government will connect this sort of event to the Kyoto Accords though.

It's too soon to think about that right now anyway. According to the Times, conditions on the ground are something akin to one of those countries the US is "rebuilding" on the other side of the world right now. There have been concerns over typhoid and cholera from dead bodies floating in the stagnant water, widespread looting, and outbreaks of predatory violence against civilians, emergency personnel, and representatives of the media. Security is enough of a concern that NBC detached it's own personnel to protect its reporters/crews because there just aren't enough National Guardsmen to maintain the peace. The good news? Those National Guard personnel have succeeded in preventing the same sort of thing from happening in a dusty, oil-rich country on the other side of the world. At least for today...

oh my dear, no!

2005-08-29T00:25:00.000-05:00

dear person,

am i your secret crush?

type:
1.) for "no, you are an asshole"
2.) for "no, i have a boyfriend and i am faithful"
3.) for "no, but i'm looking to cheat on my boyfriend"
4.) for "maybe, decisions are too much pressure"
5.) for "maybe, but you need to quit pulling my hair"
6.) for "maybe, you are holding my hair while i vomit"
5.) for "yes, but i'm scared so let's just stay friends" 6.) for "yes, now please ask me to tea"
7.) for "yes, now please fuck me sideways"

ps- please drop this in locker 714 when you are finished.

Crawling out from under my rock

2005-08-22T15:20:00.000-05:00

Hooray! I have internet again. Hard to imagine how UTFs wasted their days before the glorious interweb. I was really suffering without the constant LoHo updates. I spent like two hours wasting time on the net this morning just because I could. Unfortunately, not three hours after my web access was restored, my cable went down. In conclusion, FUCK NYU.

Anyway, little to report because I am unofficially on vacation (unofficially b/c i'm temping as a crack whore at Duvet every wednesday and thursday night while Tara is busy shooting Hard On:Taradise). Saw a couple of unremarkable shows at the Pub last week, drinking more/smoking less.

I did have one worthwhile thought last week (in addition to the song i wrote): What if the people of the United States cast a no-confidence vote regarding government counter-intelligence services? They could then withhold x amount of money from their taxes (where x is equal to the % of American tax dollars received by the Department of Homeland Security), and collectively contract with the private sector to perform counter-intelligence operations in their name. I know this opens a whole pandora's box of corruption, civil-liberty violation, and that neo-Tokyo syndicate-controlled future, but the Able Danger debacle has really emphasized the need for drastic rethinking. Maybe not the best idea, but complacency and a lack of creativity are exactly what got us into this mess so I thought I'd throw it out there to get the ball rolling...

live/dead blogging

2005-08-10T18:53:00.000-05:00

i'm not live-blogging the sox game, but they totally missed that call. everyone knows it...

anyway, i haven't done any joz shoz lately so there hasn't been much to post. friday's my last day at SN so of course i miss it already. sitting around doing nothing somewhere other than my apartment is nice. besides, i've gotten really current with all the blog and magazine time and i even finished a book today. it's cool though, i've been playing a lot of guitar lately (and smoking, eww. i'm quitting for school.), and i'm moving into a new room on sunday which i'm rather happy about.

pssh, don't run on johnny like that. what are you thinking? this has been a really good game so far and it's only the fourth...

so... well rested + playing music - lungs/money + new shoes for back to school (maybe, still not sure) - internship #1 = who cares? the sox have two on and nobody out in the top of the fourth (with manny up)!

Hard to go gold with such a limited audience

2005-08-03T13:25:00.000-05:00

Ok, so this week's "fun with disposable income" is going to involve the purchase of fabric paints at Utrecht. I'm gonna take some hanes undershirts and add a little of that ironic flava that's about to become totally passé thanks to the brahs in middle america. Mine are gonna be totally personal though... think bustedtees for record producers. Here are some of the slogans I've come up with:

-"W.W.R.R.D.?" (what would Rick Rubin do?)

-"my other console is an SSL" (funny because it's true)

-"i'd rather be mixing" (even more so than having sex)

-"yo mama likes DP" (that's Digital Performer for those unfamiliar. this is my fav but i think it's a little too risqué. maybe if i could paint the DP logo underneath...)

-"you call it underwear, i call it a shockmount"

-"compression... two pounds of shit in a one pound bag"

Anyway, I think I'm gonna call them E.L.T.E.E.s (that's everything louder than everything else for those of you who aren't Motorhead fans). I hope to be sporting one or two in the near future...

Um, think again Stewie.

2005-08-02T08:24:00.000-05:00

This is like the best thing I've read on the internet in ages...

http://www.livescience.com/technology/destroy_earth_mp.html

As the French say... Le weekend

2005-08-01T14:40:00.000-05:00

So I worked at Joe's on saturday night. The 9:30 set was your standard issue 21st century diva (doing the whole Aretha bit + afro-cuba/french chanteuse/whatever their hook is mixed in). Whatevs, I just got her on stage and bounced. The 7:30 set was the John Jorgenson Quintet, and they were really fun. It was that old-timey Django-style jazz and they did it amazingly well. I was expecting to have the same complaint as with CocoRosie (songs get samey by the end of the set), but their dynamics and song choice were really excellent. The energy was great and they got a standing O at the end. It was the first set I've been to where even the wait/bar staff was really into it (and I can't really imagine a more jaded bunch).

As for band, they were super nice. They were in their 40s/50s and had all been gigging for decades (John was in the Hellecasters, if you're familiar). Having been in it for so long they all had the "been there, done that, and lived through it" zen which makes that kind of musician such a pleasure to deal with. I liked them so much and their set was so hot that I actually let them run over by about ten minutes (see? it's not that hard to understand; pleasant + good set = accomodating stage manager). I wish everyone was so easy to deal with.

As for my life (as if you cared)... My weekend was a bit rocky. I bounced around a lot (emotionally and socially, I was at like 5 different houses/bars saturday night), but it's cool. I've been a little tense lately what with quitting drugs and giving up my beloved Bali Shag, but I'm glad I didn't have that giddy, demure emotional honesty that I get when I'm overly chilled. It could have fucked things up pretty badly. I mean, I'm not clean for good, but it's nice to have a clear head when shit comes down on it.

Oh, I got a post-breakup letter from Em. I have to say, it was totally reasonable. She really hit the nail on the head about a lot of things and there really wasn't much in the way of standard-issue female neuroticism. I should get around to writing back (said I would) today.

So in synopsis: nice musicians + emotional obliteration - drugs + chinese food = pretty okay (in a post-modern, Beta Band kind of way)

Strat Hear

2005-07-28T14:05:00.000-05:00

Okay, so it's become readily apparent during this blog's existence that only posting when I'm feeling particularly clever or I had a good highdea the night before simply does not provide the regular, constant updates which the blogosphere demands. Readers want content, content, and more content (for their sexy bods... blog joke) and if I maintain my rather more discriminating standards I simply can't deliver it. So...

I've decided to start posting reviews of the shows I work at Joe's Pub on a semi-regular basis. These reviews will not only be my jaded take on the quality of music and the live show itself, but also more personal insights into the kind of people these bands are. "Hey asshole," I hear you saying, "who the fuck died and made you king? You don't know these people, and if you did you'd kill yourself when you realized how much cooler they are than you."

Well, here's the situation: I work as a stage manager at Joe's, a job which requires you to be as personable and accomodating as possible. This means that I enter into contact with an act wanting very badly to like them because then it is just that much easier for me to treat them well. I think how a band/act behaves towards someone they know to be in this position speaks worlds about their character (and from my experience I can be quite confident in telling you they do in fact understand the power dynamic there, whether they admit it or not).

Having laid that down I'd like to do a brief review of the CocoRosie set last night...

The set itself was pretty good. The band plays what I can only describe as trip-hop a lá the New York indie scene. They had the simple, repetitive chord changes, with soaring, filtered female vocals, and the loping feel of trip hop, but interjected with some beatboxing and odd found-sound sampling. The songs were pretty and the crowd seemed absolutely riveted, but I found the material a bit samey by the end of the set (which is sometimes my response to genres like trip-hop).

As for the band... Well, I had mixed feelings. The second vocalist was very nice and seemed to quite motivated for someone who, when I first met her, was so high that she could barely remember how many people were in the band. The lead vocalist on the other hand was a bit more of a diva than I might have expected from an indie act. She delayed the set about ten or fifteen minutes putting on makeup, doing vocal warmups, and tuning her harp, and then one of the band members had the nerve to be somewhat cross with me when they ran over on time and only got through 2/3 of their setlist. Sorry guys... You may be the next thing on the indie scene but that makes you only a bit less disposable than an American Idol runner-up, and we have to clear the room by 9pm for the next set.

So... Be kind to me/or treat me mean...

2005-07-25T11:32:00.000-05:00

Ok, so this isn't gonna be one of those carefully planned, stylishly literary, sardonically funny posts (although I am already editing for word choice). This is more of a "let's fill cyberspace with some personal blog detritus." Not that friends, family (hi mom!), and secret crushes aren't interested all the same...

Anyway... Chaos! Last week was a bit off kilter and I still haven't quite shaken out the crazies yet (read: gotten blind drunk). I'm actually feeling pretty centered now though. I think we all need to grab life by the throat and give it a good shake every once in a while just to remind ourselves what our priorities are. Here's what fell out of life's pockets:

1.) Single again. I'm not getting into it here because it involves someone who has no say in the content of this blog, and that doesn't seem fair. Let's leave it at this: Hard, but under the circumstances it was necessary. It would have felt hollow and deceptive to keep going.

2.) The internships. I laid it down at Sacred Noise this week to the tune of, "I'm bored as hell and I'm not gonna take it anymore." Ok, not really, because I want to keep my stellar reference from Michael intact, but I did give them a solid final day (the 5th, two weeks earlier than I initially told them). I'm so disengaged there; I spend all day reading blogs, appropriating their music and software libraries, and drinking beer (obviously it isn't all bad... I'm just crawling out of my skin with boredom). As for Joe's, well apparently I have some pull there now. Not only am I allowed to order steak for my comped meal (although I generally don't), but I can grab a few drink tickets for people I know. One of the bartenders is a total bitch sometimes, but I just tell myself that it's hard for her, in the dwindling autumn of her youth, to be around someone as vivacious and full of accumen as myself.

3.) The trip home. Coming back to Massachusettes is always a bit surreal. I see all these people whom I haven't been in regular contact with for years. In a sense we can sort of pick up where we left off because we have so much history, but I still feel lonely when I'm here. When I try to say something funny I just get blank stares or painful misunderstanding, like people can't even tell I'm joking. I spend a lot of time feigning interest in the conversation too. It's not that I don't care, I'd just rather be talking about which Kill Bill you liked better or how you feel about the Middle East, instead spouting an endless litany of Family Guy quotes.

So those are the gears grinding in my head right now. A least I'm being honest about it though. (Admitting you're not happy?!?! WEAKLING!!!!!) So here's hoping that by the end of summer I can go back to being an extraordinary machine.

Somebody should be paying me for this...

2005-06-30T12:51:00.000-05:00

I was walking home from Sacred Noise yesterday when the most brilliant inspiration I've had in months came to me. At 3rd and 11th I saw some brah with a GAP Athletic and it dawned on me: GAPathetic... Clothing for hipster wannabes.

Now that the whole post new wave musical thing is en vogue outside of downtown Manhattan thanks to uber-shitty bands like The Killers and The Bravery, middle america needs duds to match the tunes.

Here's how I see it: The Gap starts a clothing line called GAPathetic consisting solely of jeans and t-shirts. The jeans would be cut exactly the same for girls and boys (to eschew any hint of classic sexuality) and range in size from 24/24 to 32/32. The Gap could employ an army of homeless Chinese who wear each pair for a month to get the wear and odor perfectly hipsterrific. T-shirts would be sized XXXS to M and they could have clever, sarcastic slogans like

"How GAPathetic? I dunno, I hadn't really thought about it."

or

"GAPathetic. It's kinda like GAP Atheletic, except we don't run or catch or play sports."

I think it's fuckin genius, but then again I'm conceited.

She digs it... an update on your favorite celebrity couples.

2005-06-11T11:47:00.000-05:00

TomKat- Tom is currently fucking the brains out of Katie Holmes. In between rounds he reads her Scientology: Auditor's Handbook and Battlefield Earth.

Nick and Jessica- Unfortunately these two are in a bit of a rough patch due to Jessica getting double-teamed by Johnny Knoxville and Bam Margera on the set of The Dukes of Hazzard.

Justin and Cameron- Still not doing anything interesting.

Bennifer 2- Ben and Jen are planning their wedding down to the last detail. A particularly contentious point has been whose publicist gets to call it off at the last second.

Brad and Angelina- Hopefully they are in a hotel room at some global chakra point (on top of Mt. Arrarat, the geographical north pole, the exact center of Los Angelos) working towards the repopulation of Earth with their seed.

The Living Brain: Unprovable, etc.

2005-06-05T23:04:00.000-05:00

Top Five Songs Ruling My Life Right Now:

1.) Bang, Bang by Nancy Sinatra (listen right now)

2.) Dry The Rain by The Beta Band (I can do that, I just don't wanna)

3.) Love Is Only A Feeling by The Darkness (um, nice chorus... boy I came late to that one)

4.) A Long Ryhme Coming by Celph Titled (freestyler than you)

5.) the next good song on the weezer record (jk, there aren't any)

6.) um, Nancy Sinatra again?

An Open Letter to Rivers Cuomo.

2005-06-03T13:06:00.000-05:00

Dear Rivers,
It's been some time since we spoke/communed/wept quietly on the floor of my bedroom, and a lot's happened. You put out a couple of new records, you banged some Asian groupies... But there were hard times as well. In your cover article on Rolling Stone you bemoaned how emotionally bereft you've been recently. You gave up all of your posessions (I think I saw your Sponge Bob soapdish on eBay...), you moved into a humble apartment around the corner from Rick Rubin, and you became celibate. Man, you're kinda like Jesus or Buddha or one of those guys, huh?

Anyway, I thought it was time for us to reconnect and address the problems we've been having lately. Rivers, well, the thing is... I'm just not that into you anymore. At first there was the spark of an emotional bond. You know, long walks late at night talking about our grandparents, or surfing, or whatever crossed our minds. And the guitar solos! They weren't anything wild and experimental, but there was a force of passion that made them so satisfying.

Now it feels like we've lost something. I don't know exactly what's missing. Maybe you've changed, maybe I have. Whatever's happened, the spark that first drew us together is gone. Sure, the choruses are still anthemic, but I just don't feel them in my gut the same way. Even the solos are just kind of the same old thing. Yeah, the talkbox is awesome on "Beverly Hills," and I thank heaven that Rick Rubin came into our lives when he did. I don't think we would even have lasted this long if he hadn't.

But now Rivers... It's over. I just can't keep praying for you to turn it around even as I watch you fall farther and farther from what you once were, so I'm ending it. From now on we're casual acquaintences who make small talk at parties about Ashlee Simpson or the latest Spike Jonze joint. I guess it's ok... I'm just sorry it had to end on "Haunt You Every Day" instead of "Butterfly."

Josh

oh, i've got a case of the mondays you wouldn't believe Bob...

2005-04-25T23:09:00.000-05:00

I've been listening to my vinyl collection (while simultaneously getting good and drunk out of sheer boredom) for the last few hours and i just put on The Avalanches, only to find that the first track is in the same key that my wine glasses sound at when empty.

For the stoners in the audience and those of you who have not spent months of your life in a recording studio let me tell you, in all likelihood this was not by design. Everyone involved in the making of Since I Left You was too busy with things genuinely essential to the creation of it to worry about whether or not the title track resonated in sympathy with wine glasses. However... this does speak directly to my obsession with records.

A truly great record (which The Avalanches' Since I Left You is, without question in my mind) does things like that; it talks about body language just as the blond across the room shoots you a glance, it suddenly goes quiet when there's a knock on the door, it works, enmeshed in the greater forces of the universe, on levels which its creators hardly plan for and barely understand.

Why?

I don't know. I suspect it has something to do with the apparent wave-structure of both the universe (see any quantum physics primer for clarification) and music itself. But when dealing with forces of this magnitude it is impossible to know.

.

2005-04-25T13:54:00.000-05:00

Attention Kevin Federline: CORN ROWS LOOK STUPID ON WHITE PEOPLE.

also, Britney is now officially a big 'ol mess. betcha didn't see that coming.

BECAUSE IT'S RHYME TIME!!!!!!!!!

2005-03-11T02:47:00.000-05:00

Firstly, can i just say that I ran my first pool table tonight? Yes (bows), i did in fact do this in the green room at 17. I hate venues that cop their name from their street address. That being said,,,

I also decided to start actually doing some work. In class tonight Bob mentioned that the course of rock and roll had been changed by a few Jewish men putting out records in the early 60s. I'd start a lable if it weren't so much goddamn work, but Matt's got me convinced that there's an easy dolla still to be made in hiphop. It worked for Rick Rubin...

Anyway, sprind break starts at 12:34 on saturday, when my flight lands in SJ Puerto Rico. I'm gonna be all drunk, and I'll do my best to blog it up from pleasanter climbs and make you all jealous. Much love regardless of temperature (it's probably about 34 here).

.

2005-02-20T03:02:00.000-05:00

I'm trying to smile more.

I can do that, I just don't wanna

2005-02-04T11:10:00.000-05:00

Ok, meaning to write this up for like a week....

I was talking random artsy shit with Chris last Friday, and he asked me how long it took me to really start using my ears. I thought about for a second and said "a year and a half." The conversation developed out of my complaints of boredom with music lately (which I'm totally over, at least for now); I was asking how long it would take me to become a decent visual artist. Despite my temporary contentedness with music I'm still pursuing the sketching thing (having decided that my medium is most definitely Sharpie) and I'm reading enough poetry now that I think I might eventually be able to do that.

Still,
as with all,
perhaps this too shall pass.

Britney did what?

2005-01-20T14:26:00.000-05:00

I'm slowly realizing why bloggers are so big on pop culture. The pratfalls of celebrity self-destruction provide a truly endless source of laughable, easily recognizable vignettes about which to write on a daily basis. My life is nowhere near as engaging, and I'm not big on the publishing of mundanity, even if it is only in cyberspace. I'm sorry, but the time it takes me to type out my uber-boring daily routine is just better spent writing songs and catching up on my reading.

Wow, I read that back and realize how positively the decreased intake of drugs has effected my vocabulary. I may not know as many words now as I did when I took the SATs (800 verbal bitch. yeah, that's my brag for today), but I've certainly moved forward since last semester. Let's just hope I can stick with it... at least until tomorrow.

Progerse

2005-01-13T12:17:00.000-05:00

(no typo in the title, read more Vonnegut)

Comcast On-Demand is the hottest thing to happen to television since the remote control. We were sitting around last night watching all of these music videos which they have in their library but never seem to see the light of day, even on MTV2/Fuse/etc. I didn't even know that Kid Koala had the money to make videos until last night ("Carpal Tunnel Syndrome" actually makes sense when accompanied with a video).

There is amazing other shit that you can do with On-Demand too. Of course it offers concerts and movies and shit like that, but there are also guitar lessons, weather reports, and all sorts of other unnecessary digital tidbits to improve the life of the upper-middle class sububurbanite (which is so desperately in need of improvement).

Along with tagless undershirts and that zipper-like device that they put on saran wrap boxes to make cutting sheets off easier, On-Demand is definitely on my list of inventions which have made this century better than the last.

I know who you are...

2005-01-11T00:42:00.000-05:00

One of the things I like most about blogs is that people feel more liberated to express themselves than they otherwise might. Cyberspace lends itself to that. Screennames, chat rooms, discussion forums; all designed to allow the potentially anonymous voicing of whatever the user feels. The catch with this blog (assuming that anyone reads this aside from random click-throughs from Blogger) is that I have a pretty good idea of who you are.

The following I know...

1.) You are on thefacebook and have recently check out my profile. I know this because that is the only place where I have made known the existence of this blog.
2.) When you are excessively bored/antsy/procrastinative you spend your time screwing around on your computer (like me).
3.) You blog (read or write, either way).

So assuming you're not some facebook stalker (and that's cool if you are, everyone does it), I can narrow the field to about a dozen potential viewers (artsy friends ≠ computer people). To those people I say this:

Why don't we just sit down for a cup of coffee every once in a while?

brokelyn funk essential-esque

2005-01-08T21:34:00.000-05:00

Brooklyn's ok, I guess. It has the reputation it does for a reason. It just feels like everyone is overly concerned with their own hipness. I'm growing to love being halfway between that and the shamelessness of the village.

2005-01-05T00:05:00.000-05:00

can i just say "good for paris?" i'm jealous of her and so are you.

NYE

2005-01-04T22:23:00.000-05:00

I was recently asked how i got to the nye party that i attended (during the latter half of the evening)...

1. me --> 2. invite from my friend Jess to a house party in BK on Jay St. later tells me she was in a subway station with a dead cell. --> 3. wander around brooklyn for half an hour waiting for her, eventually decide that I'll just find the party. --> 4. do so... only to be greated enthusiastically by some blond who i was sure knew me. i lacked her conviction, but regardless... --> 5. at party happen to meet the upstairs roomate of the host of said party (whom i spoke to while he was spinning without knowing he was the host). --> 6. invited to party at which we met (the host was naked when i left... i never caught his name)

i'm such a sheep...

2005-01-04T13:09:00.000-05:00

New blog! If I'm bored enough to write this, there are probably people out there who are bored enough to read it, so why not?

Anyway, I will neither make nor keep any promises from this point forward excepting that I swear I will never post any retarded pictures of my pet(s) that I happen to find cute/entertaining/arousing. I'll leave that shit to the 12 year old girls and 26 year old hipsters who have the maturity level of 12 year old girls. Also, I promise a steady stream of profanity-leaden, not as hilarious as I find them, drunk/stoned/exhausted 4am posts refering in graphic detail to how I failed to get any that evening. Now there's something for the kids.

Furthermore, I declare, and so it shall be typed, to all the people who know me that anything you say can and will be used against in the court of my blog. So watch your fuckin' mouths.

It strikes me that perhaps the first widely popular blogger was Maddox @ xmission. If you are unfamiliar with Maddox, simply google "best page in the universe." You will find it amply more amusing than my shit (though in a much more crass sort of way).